Healing...

Well, I'm still breathing. I'm here, alive and doing ok. Hit a rough patch and it's going to take just a bit of time to work myself through it and build back my self confidence but I can do it. I have faith. I have faith in my friends, I have faith in my career and most of all (contrary to what I think most of the time) I have faith in myself as a person. I believe all of the cliche's like "when it rains it pours" (believe me the fuckin storm is still a raging) and "everything happens for a reason" (what they leave out is that these reasons don't always become apparent to you, you just have to trust that there is a reason) and the kicker is "time heals all wounds" I especially believe in this! For those of you that have seen the movie "Someone Like You" with Ashley Judd you'll know that this quote is used but in a more unique way that I've adapted as well. "Time wounds all heals"
It always gives me a little chuckle which is the goal I"m assuming.

So needless to say, I don't know what fucking chapter I'm on right now but the scene has definitley ended and we're now moving on to another. Hell, if you ask me I'd say I up and changed books but thats me trying to speak in analogies again! I just want to say thanks to my friends who are always there for me to tell me I'm great, I'm beautiful, I'm special, I'm fun and I am worth something that one day someone will see. Thanks to my friends for making me laugh when all I want to do is curl up in a ball and cry myself to sleep. Thanks to my friends for not letting me feel self pity because life is seriously too short and there is so much out there to still see and feel. Thanks to my friends for letting me scream bloody murder one minute and then collapse into sobs the next. I'm erratic but you all except that. As bad as I might feel, as low as I might get sometimes, the light that pulls me out of my dark misery is the light of your friendship. Your warm hearts, open minds and unfailing neccesity to always be there for me no matter what the odds is what gets me through times like these.

I'm lucky! I'm truly lucky to have so much love in my life. I'm lucky to know that despite how much it hurts right now, the rain will let up, the sun will shine and there will be another beautiful day. I just have to have faith. Everything else will work itself out.

Thanks. I love You!